The first time without

The first time without, it was still numb. The knowledge was there, but the belief wasn’t. Then time passed slowly, but healed no wounds. Shortly after, came the first month. Now, one whole month without. One month of longing every single day. Looking back now, it was a month of firsts. The first time without the laughter, or the tears. But that beautiful laugh was ever so dear.

It was the first full moon without that sense of wonder. Without those dreams of better things. And then, one whole month was gone. From there, Spring came. Although it didn’t seem real, it was the first Spring without you. Who knew Spring was so full of so many special things? You did. And that was one of the ways a loving spirit makes life beautiful.

Time

Time passes, and this too shall pass. However, it seems there will be firsts all along the way. The first Fourth of July. The bottle rockets, and firecrackers, no longer a part. The first summer, now one whole season, without. Right on through the heat and the late sunsets. One whole season passing by without you.

Seasons change. And the first Fall arrived. It was the same as the ones in previous years. However, this one came without you. Halloween did too. Furthermore, it was the first one without your unique style. The first one without your heartwarming and precious smile. And because of the flow, time moves forward.

Without

With this in mind, the first birthday came. To say it is a favored day is to make an understatement. But of course I would believe this way. However, it was the first birthday with no candles to light. In fact, the first birthday without a cake. Although this year, it wasn’t on the same day as the Thanksgiving holiday. Something I know you would’ve enjoyed.

The first Thanksgiving without. The first one without you. However, it was a first in other ways too. It was the first time to be thankful for every precious moment there was with you. Especially the best times, the cherished memories, and the deep ache for what was. The first time without.

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